for some reason i really dont like today. is not that someone upset me or whatever. is just that the feeling of doing nothing sitting in front of the com staring at it is totally a piss. shifting to green is good. the whole environment is so much better than nobel. the people here is good. but just that i dont have things to do in green. is not like in nobel whereby i'm doing all the shit thing alone. and yes i mean ALL shit things. but right now in green, i dont. cause diff shits there is diff ppl in handling. sigh. look.. i even have time to blog. so imagine. i'm sorry that i complain so much but is just that i dont like the way i am now. i prefered the busy days whereby i dont even have time to go toilet..oh gosh. busy days pls come back. oh ya. one thing i should comment bout green is the environment is really good. i felt so comfortable when i'm at there.

i know is abit random but i seriously must say i miss the them (xue fen,duncan,irritating & ah mok.)

Iris

Should i go or should i not?
i think i'm going.
cause i wanna be there and let you know i truly loves you.
wait for me..

popo

this few days alot of things tend to happen.it consist lots of mixed feelings and questions.i dont know what's the next step in this relationship..holding ur hand is something can make me realise the road is still long.and i dont think i can walk the rest of the road by myself..though things went back to its pace.but i guess i still need time to re adjust myself cause is not easy to forget what has happened.forgive me that.i know u are trying ur very best to save this relationship..i can see and sense.i'm sorry..is just that i really need time to find the feelings back...

iris

waitin.. standing.. walking ard..
i can realli feel so nervous like e first time we met..
i hav tot of few sentence to say but upon see her..
all words jus disappear le.
holdin her hand without sayin anything..
i can realli feel tt without her i will nv noe wat to do anymore.
i realli miss her..

hee
i bought her 2 small gifts
i tink its e first time i buy her a soft toy
haa
although its small
but i hope she like it

todae is thurs le
po po yest hav bad headache
and todae ok le but still hav a lot of work to do
yao jia you ohh
work can nv finish one
so take good care of ur health k?

e movie tt u wan to watch is out todae le
吓到笑
we will go watch it together k?

i had a dream last nite..
a dream tt i hope i wun wake up from it..
but its impossible..
my handphone ring at 725am..
e time tt i set when i was still wif her..
i almost smash my hp..
i realli hate it as it jus smash my dream..
i try to go back to it again but it jus nv come anymore....

can e scar be heal..
can i be e medicine for it..

i had nv forgotten u r my gf.. in fact i had even fear like i m still holdin on e bag.. when i go into e air con place.. e feelin of fear n fear of being left alone inside and lookin at the worried loves one looking at u outside.. my hand r shivering.. n its realli shivering..
hav u feel e cold sweat keep coming from ur forehead and from ur whole body..
even until i swop e bag wif u.. e sweat jus dun stop.. e fear of u holdin e thing is e same as e feelin of mi holdin..i realli realli scare of things will happen.. i follow up closing behing u jus in case anything realli happen..
i put my wallet n handphone in the bag.. i m still tinkin wat if realli got caught.. can i jus admit tts my bag wif all e belongings of mine inside..
i nv blame on why mus all this happen.. i m jus scare.. i realli admit i m scare..
after my first incident.. my mum always told mi not to do anything tt will break e law due to our status here.. tts y all e way till now.. i dun dare to do any of such things again unless clearli noe nth will happen..
i noe apologised will nv save this situation anymore..
i can see e sadness n disappoinments in ur face when u r goin down e escalator..
till now i still havin e fear in my heart..
i realli cant imagine what will happen if realli got caught..

time..
if u realli nid it..
i will giv it..
some scars will nv heal.. some scars nid time to heal.. some scars nid love n understanding to heal..

past..
i can see our past also..
i can feel it n dream of it..
but i noe i can nv get it anymore..
our first smile in u n mine phone.. in our computers.. in our friendster.. in our facebook..
our smile in our last photo taken..
do we jus smile becoz of takin a photo.. or do we smile becoz we found each other till now..

i can feel ur tears.. even when i dun see it..
i can see ur heart is breakin.. even when i cant feel it..
becoz we r doin e same thing.. havin e same feeling..

do i still love u.. or do i jus too get used to hav u..
my ans is always e same as i first answered u..
if one person is jus gettin used of havin another one..
will he tear when he made her sad and smile when he did something tt make her happi..

do love realli can make u love e person as he is..
or
do love make u change e person to what u wan he to be..

all these will make us think a lot.. will make us grow and love each other more.. will make us grow and detest each other more..
if love is always one sided.. will it jus grow from one side and sink from e other side?
or will it make both realise on how to balance it..

all i wan to say.. is i love u.. i can nv promise such thing will nv happen again.. but i can onli promise i will nv make u feel tt way again.. will u also make a promise.. a promise of a call or a msg to mi.. when u hav used finish e time..

iris.